Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam….

Remember Monty Python and the Spam song? I can’t say the word without humming the tune. And you can’t be a blogger without getting spam comments daily.

I always delete them. But sadly, many are some of the nicest, albeit computer generated, comments I’ll ever hope to hear. I give you some of my favorites:

1. I love your blog. You are a genius. I will follow you forever. (I’ve often thought of myself having genius-like qualities. Except when I leave things on the hood of my car and drive off, lock myself out of the house, go to one room in search of something and forget what that something is when I get there, show up at the wrong time OR date for a birthday party, constantly run 15 minutes late….)

2. Thank you for your intriguing and brilliant thoughts. You are the best blogger I have found. (Really? Better then the Pioneer Woman? Better then Dooce? Better then The Bloggess? Liar, liar pants on fire BUT - hey - thanks!)

3. You make me think a lot about things I don’t think about. I will continue to follow your blog with great enthusiasm. (I like to provoke thoughts about important topics like Christmas lights, fresh breath and blue cotton candy - so thanks! And I really like enthusiast followers. But I also like lazy followers. Just know that if you follow me, I love you. I’m just accepting like that.)

4. Wow, fantastic blog layout! How long have you been blogging for. You make blogging look easy. (To answer the non-real person that asked this: two and half years. I also make pouring a bowel of cereal, writing checks and coming up with different ideas to get out of housework look easy too. Mamas got talents!)

But some spam comments don’t make me smile. Like this one:

He-he I see that you doing good buddy, well written content. It would be good for you if you could invest in some ads you know, then you’re blog would be blooming after that. (Was that a compliment? No. Buddies don’t make buddies invest in ads. But thanks anyway blooming spammer! And it’s your not you’re.)

Or this:

Great to meet you blogger discovered your blog via yahoo but it was hard to find and I see you could have more visitors because there are not so many comments yet….(This comment hurts my head because it’s both insulting and a run on sentence.)

But this morning I got one that made me smile. Not because of the message. But because of the sender.

Hello. What’s new? What’s up?….from Vicodin. (It makes me feel kinda good that Vicodin is just wondering how I am. Nothing to sell. No fake nice comments or knife jabbing comments disguised as compliments. But how did Vicodin find me and when did we get into such a personal relationship? I mean, it’s been two years since my rotator cuff surgery and even longer then that since I had my gallbladder removed. I want to reply back: I’m good, thanks. Glad I haven’t had any major pains or surgeries requiring the need for a prescription for you - but it’s always fun watching you on the hit TV show House!)

Side not: The comment from Vicodin was made on my post entitled: Note to Self: Avoid Melt-Downs By Taking Care of Myself! Priceless - right?!


Snow Day In Houston - Has the Whole City Gone Mad?

So I’ve been watching the city go into freak out mode for the past two days about the cold weather we’re having. It has been in the 20’s and 30’s. Below freezing is cold for Houston BUT….they’ve all but shut down the town because it’s supposed to rain tonight and we might get some snow tomorrow. (Schools are closed, activities canceled, etc.) I can hear those in upstate New York laughing at us from here.

I feel somewhat responsible for our weather predicament. I’ve been hoping and praying for some cold weather this winter and have been in hog heaven bundled up in a blanket, fire (albeit a gas and fake log one) in the fireplace, cup of hot cocoa in my hands…reading a good book.

I know this weather will pass for us soon (unlike a lot of people in the country who have it for several months…which could get old) but I plan to enjoy it while it lasts. If you are home-bound, too - here’s a video to watch to keep you busy! It’s old, but it’s funny. Enjoy! :)


Carl’s Jr. - I Just Don’t Get It

A couple of weeks ago a Carl’s Jr. burger joint went up a couple miles down the road from me. Apparently it’s the only one in Houston and is a big deal. Everybody’s all, “Oh my gosh, there’s a Carl’s Jr. here now” and I’m all “What the heck is a Carl’s Jr.?” and there all, “Oh my gosh, it’s the best.”

Which I was assuming was true because since it’s opened there has been a line of at least 20 cars in the drive-thru at all hours of the day. Today Ed said, “Let’s go see what all the fuss is about and get a burger.” And I said, “ok”. Because I’m pretty easy-going like that. And I wanted to see what all the hullabaloo was for myself. And because I love any opportunity to say and/or write the word “hullabaloo”.

So we went there at 11:30 a.m. and at noon we finally got through the drive-thru line. As we waited in line I looked over across the street at poor little Wendy’s. Just sitting there. All alone. No one in line. I’m thinking the owner of that particular restaurant was like, “It’s so awesome that Carl’s Jr. opened up across the street. That makes me so happy. The only one in Houston - right across the street from me. Can you believe the luck?!!”

Then I looked over to the left and saw Chick-filet and thought the owner over there was probably thinking, “Hamburgers are for losers, Carl - it’s all chicken - baby!” Then I remembered that they are a Christian organization and they probably wouldn’t think that. They probably wish Carl well and think there’s room for everyone in our fast-food obsessed market. Plus - they have a really kick-ass drive-thru system and you’re in and out quickly. So they have that going for them. And the cow mascot. They’ll definitely be ok.

I ordered “the original $6.00 burger” combo with a coke. They were out of Coke. That wasn’t a good way for me and Carl to start off our relationship. Mama likes her Coke. Not Coke Zero. Not Diet Coke. Coke. It’s how I roll.

But what was really disappointing (besides the fact that I ORDERED my $6.00 burger with lettuce, mayo and ketchup and GOT my burger with cheese and meat, is that it just wasn’t good. It was overcooked, dry and cold. Just like I make them at home. Yuck.

So Carl’s Jr. - I’m sorry - but I just don’t get it. But thanks for the inspiration for this blog post.